Hello everyone, I'm Janell and I hope that we can become great friends. A little bit about myself. I'm a transgender female and my story is very rocky. To start off, I've known something was wrong with me since I was 11 and I never new anything about transgenders or even the word until 2013. I would always go to bed at night wishing that I would wake up in a girls body and be disappointed every morning when I woke up. I even tried going outside at night and try wishing on stars. It wasn't until I my yearly physical in 2013 that I finally asked my doctor the question. I was scared to ask him but somehow I was able to work up the courage to ask. I asked him if it was ok for me to have thoughts and want to be a girl. He asked me a bunch of questions and then told me that he thinks that I might be transgender and that was the first time I ever heard that word. I asked him what transgender was and he told me and the thought that came to mind was, I'm not alone and I felt a bit relieved. When my birthday came around that same year, I decided that I didn't want to go through another birthday not being who I was. I told my dad and step mom first and to my surprise and this is upsetting because they were totally against it. I thought they would be supportive because being Christian, we are taught to love everyone just the way we are. My brothers were the next and two of my brothers were ok with it and my other brother was not. I then told my mom and step dad and I had another surprise because I thought they would also be against it but they weren't. Months later and a lot of consulting, I was finally given the ok from my doctor to start hormone replacement therapy. I went to my doctor appointment and had to sign some papers stating that I understood the risks and some changes would be permanent if I chose to stop my hormones. A few years go by and I found myself to be homeless and family that closed there doors on me. I should mention that I'm also mentally ill and have been my whole life but over the years it just got worse. Anyways I ended up living in a homeless shelter for a little over a year. I met my ex in the shelter but at the time I had no idea what was about to happen later on. My ex and her family started to get in my head and make me start to believe lies about myself. I found myself for the first time questioning who I was and I ended up going from 2017 to the middle of September in 2021 on and off hormones. I decided in May of 2021 that I was putting my foot down and I was no longer coming off my hormones. During the time I was in questioning mode I was putting up with verbal and mental abuse from my ex and her family. I was too scared to get out and I had no where to go. My ex started to physically abuse me and rape me but I didn't know at the time it was rape until my therapist told me. At the same time my family started to disown me. I was still talking to my mom and dad for awhile but decided to finally cut them out of my life. Before I came to that decision I decided to plan my getaway from my ex and I ended up inpatient for a week. I was released from the hospital into a crisis house. I was in the crisis house for 6 weeks and then I was able to get into a site house. I've been in my site home for a few months now and I can be my true self again. I have also started Lazer hair removal so I can get my body ready for bottom surgery. I know I have to be on hormones and live full time as a woman. I'm just killing two birds with one stone and I'm just getting my body ready that way I don't have to wait as long. While I'm in the waiting period, I'm planning on doing a lot of other hair removal. I still haven't got my facial hair removed yet and I know what you are probably thinking. I probably should have started with my face first and I did think about it but decided that I want to have what I should have been born with. I know in my heart that this is the right decision. A little bit of other things about me is I love video games, anime, art, and music. I'm mostly a Nintendo gamer but I am saving up for a gaming computer. I like all kinds of animals but my favorite will always be Fairy Tail. I'm what I call myself to be is a mimic artist, what that means is I find artwork on the internet to draw because I can't keep a image in my head long enough to put in on paper. I really enjoy video game music and animation music. I know this was a lot of information and if you read this to the end, I sincerely thank you.